


Valentine Mine

by brimstonegold, virtualpersonal



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Sam gains some experience with others, Sexy Times, Smoking, Teenagers, Teenchesters, Valentine's Day, sam is fifteen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-29
Updated: 2015-01-29
Packaged: 2018-03-09 14:30:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3253235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brimstonegold/pseuds/brimstonegold, https://archiveofourown.org/users/virtualpersonal/pseuds/virtualpersonal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fifteen year old Sam thinks there's no hope for him, he'll never find a girlfriend, never have a valentine. Then he's told that if he makes a Valentine card and leaves it someplace, it will be found by his true love</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> [](http://tinypic.com)  
>  Abby Juniper's manipulation used with permission in banner.
> 
> co-written with Brimstonegold

It had taken him two weeks. For a fifteen year old, two weeks was just shy of forever. After two weeks of giving her bashful hellos and offering to carry her books, and actually holding a few nervous conversations with her, he finally, _finally_ got up the nerve to ask her. And she said 'yes.'

This would be his very first Valentine's Day Dance. Oh, sure he could have gone to them before, but he'd never had the nerve to actually ask a girl. He never seemed to be in school long enough to find someone he wanted to take that wasn't already taken. 

Who was he kidding? That was an excuse. Girls made him nervous. Dean had been nudging Sam to start dating, but Sam just didn't have the same confidence Dean did. He didn't have the looks, couldn't talk the talk or walk the walk. He'd shot up in height the summer before and he swore he was still trying to get his suddenly too long of legs and too long of arms to do what he wanted them to. He felt gangly and clumsy and as if all his muscles had simply stretched out in an effort to try to cover the lengthening bones. Sam felt like a skeleton next to his muscular brother. He worked out hard, trying to regain the muscle his growth spurts seemed to steal, but he wasn't sure he was making any progress and he would never be as muscular and hot as his brother and he knew it. At least his voice had stopped cracking and finally changed. 

He could hardly wait to tell Dean that he had finally asked Veronica. Dean would be pleased, he was certain. When he jogged up to the motel and saw his father's truck, he felt a cold weight settle in his stomach. No!! His dad wasn't suppose to be home yet! He was suppose to help backup Caleb on a job a day's drive away. Well Sam just wouldn't leave. He'd get a bus ticket and follow to whereever the next hunt was. It was his first Valentine Dance! His first _real_ shot at having a girlfriend! Even if only for a few weeks.

Sam took a deep breath and opened the door. The packed duffels were already sitting on the beds and Dean was gathering up his research from the table. Sam didn't see his father but the bathroom door was shut. "Dean?" he asked softly.

Dean looked up and gave him a grin. "Hey Sammy. I got your shit packed already."

"But I thought we had another couple weeks here. Dad said--" Sam whined.

John opened the bathroom door, a towel wrapped around his waist and he was drying his dark hair with another towel. "Pastor Jim went to help Caleb. Caleb is dealing with a demonic possession. That means we're headed to New Hampshire."

"Okay," Sam said. "Then...then I'll get a bus ticket and meet up with you next week." He jutted his chin out defiantly.

"What?" John exclaimed. "No. We're leaving, all of us."

"But Dad! I've...I've got a date to the Valentine's Day Dance. Please Dad!"

John's brow lifted in surprise. This was the first date he'd heard Sam talk about it. It might be his very first date, for all John knew. He felt badly, but he wasn't about to leave his boy alone and unprotected and then there were the people in New Hampshire, they might have a chance at saving them if they left right away. He shook his head. "I'm sorry, Sammy. No."

"It's SAM!" Sam snapped at him. "And I'm not going. I'm staying until after the dance!"

"The hell you are," John bellowed. "Help your brother get the truck loaded. We're leaving in fifteen minutes!"

"Dad...!" Sam began.

"That's enough. You'll do as I say."

Sam stomped out of the hotel, slamming the door so hard the lamps rattled.

* * *

It was drizzling. Again. It had been since they'd first arrived at Hebron, New Hampshire, where the disappearances of 7 children and two teachers over the course of the last three years was sharply felt by the less than 300 population of the town. They needed help. John Winchester had thought he might need his youngest to attend school there to find out some information, so here they were.

Only, Sam had never registered at school. Hadn't needed to. Based on their investigations about the backgrounds of the missing people, it had turned out that all of them were gifted in some way. Really, that meant that they had some sort of ESP... some psychic gift that had Dean making a face. Just cause they were human, it didn't make 'em non-freaks, right? That's what he'd thought, until they'd tracked the monster that had taken them, and found its victims chained up in an old school house from the last century. They were just regular people, from what Dean could tell. Nothing freaky about them, at least no freakier than Missouri, who yeah...did give him the creeps, but mostly because she read his mind and there was alot of NC-17 type information stored in it that he didn't like to share.

"Sam, catch." Dean threw his younger brother the crowbar and grinned when he caught it and used it to break the cuffs that held one of the victims to the wall. Sam might complain about their lifestyle ... a lot... but he was getting damn good at this, whether Sam, or their dad, realized it or not.

Once they freed all the victims, John looked at Sam. "Salt the doorway and windows, then give these folks some water and call the sheriff," he jerked his chin toward the cell phone he'd left on an old, crumbling student desk. "Dean, let's go."

Pulling the salt bags out of the duffel he'd been carrying, and leaving them for Sam, Dean loaded his shotgun, and opened the door. "Sam... salt first." Yeah, he knew Sam knew the rules, but he couldn't help reinforcing, even if he caught the dark look from his dad that said he was wasting time. "Let's do it," he said, following his father out the door, and pulling it shut behind them. This Tornab demon had wreaked havoc in this little town. It was time for them to finish it. 

*

There were two kids and one teacher and the bones of the other five kids and teacher in the room. Ignoring Dean's advice, Sam got the canteens out and for the former captives. They would have to help each other while he got the salt laid. The ten year old child was the last to disappear from town and in the best shape and was helping the seven year old and the teacher. As Sam used his knife to cut the bag of salt open and began pouring it at the entrances, he knew the victims were lucky. The seven year old was in pretty bad shape and so was the teacher. He didn't think either were near death but they were half starved and definitely dehydrated. 

He'd just finished laying the salt at the last window when something red and sort of scaley slammed against the window and screeched. Sam stumbled back and let out a cry of surprise and the three victims all shrieked in terror.

Nothing like a shot of adrenalin to tell you your brother had been right. If he'd been even a second slower getting that salt laid...

"It's okay," Sam soothed them. "It can't get across the salt. We're safe in here now. I promise." He dug into the supplies and brought over power bars and applesauce. "I'm Sam. My brother Dean and my dad, they'll kill that thing out there and you won't ever have to worry about it coming back."

The teacher, Miss Wissen, who had long black hair with a streak of silver running down the right side, whispered, "thank you." With a shaky hand she took the power bar Sam opened for her and began devouring it. "This is what your family does?" she asked around a mouthful of the bar.

"Hunt monsters. Save people. Yeah," Sam said. "We," he sighed, "we go whereever the job takes us."

"You're on the road a lot then?" she said, sympathy in her tone. She had been an army brat and knew what it was like to move around all the time.

Sam nodded. The dance was tonight. Veronica, he could be slow dancing with Veronica right now. He looked at the three people and suddenly felt really guilty. He was mourning a dance with a girl he wouldn't have seen more than another week anyhow and these three had almost died. How selfish could you get? He opened the applesauce and helped the youngest of the victims, Peter, who was in a Spiderman t-shirt and jeans, sit up. Sam cradled him in his arms, holding the cup up to the boy's mouth so he could sort of slurp it down. The ten year old was a girl, Desiree, her hair short but a tangled mop not unlike Sam's except she was a blond. She gobbled down two of the power bars and drank half a canteen of water, then leaned in and kissed Sam on the cheek with her cold wet lips.

"Thank you for saving us, Sam," she said.

Sam felt his cheeks color a little. "My brother did all the research. He figured it out."

"But you stopped the monster from coming back and getting us," she said, sounding a little lovestruck.

"The salt stopped it," he corrected her.

"Then I'm keeping salt at my bedroom door and windows for the rest of my life!" she proclaimed, and guzzled down more water.

Sam gave her a smile, then took the canteen for the boy and held it up to his lips. He tilted it up, giving him small swallows at a time. The boy finally nodded that he'd had enough for the moment. He looked at Sam with big blue eyes. 

"You missed your dance," he said softly. "Because of us."

Surprise crossed Sam's face. Well, they knew all the victims were 'gifted.' He brushed a dirty lock of brown hair off Peter's forehead. "That's okay. You were more important. It'll be a great Valentine's Day gift for all your families to have you back."

"She wasn't right for you anyhow," the boy said. "It should be true love for a first kiss."

"Oh, it should, huh? And what would you know about first kisses and true love? And I've kissed someone before."

"Kisses from your true love are different. The others don't count. I'll meet my true love when I'm twenty two. I'll be in a car accident and she'll be the nurse. We'll get married and gonna have three kids, all girls. The oldest we'll name Samantha. I always wondered why, but now I know. Cause of you."

Sam wasn't sure if he should be flattered, embarrassed, or what. "You don't have to do that," he told Peter, not sure he believed the kid anyhow. 

"I always knew I would, I just didn't know why." Peter waved Sam to lean in. When Sam did, Peter whispered, "You need to make a Valentine card. Tonight. Before midnight. You'll lose it, but your true love will find it and find you. Promise. Before midnight."

Sam straightened and looked at the boy and shook his head.

"Really," Peter insisted. "I see love. And that's what you need to do. You'll never know your true love unless you do it. You'll find other love, but not your true love. I can make sure you will."

"And how can you do that?" Sam said, half-teasingly. The boy waved him to lean back in and Sam did. He was startled when the boy's cracked and dry lips pressed briefly against his and Sam felt an almost electrical tingle run through his body. Sam jerked back. "What did you do that for!"

Peter smiled. "Magic. Best magic is a kiss. Kisses can fix anything. That's what momma says. Now you'll have the magic until midnight. Kiss the valentine you make and it'll work. Cross my heart."

Sam glanced at the other two. Desiree seemed oblivious, having found the handiwipes in Sam's pack and was busy washing her hands and face. The teacher was trying hard not to laugh at Sam and the look on his face.

"Okay, can you sit up on your own now?" he asked Peter. The boy nodded and Sam got him sitting up and leaning against the wall. He got to his feet and retrieved the cellphone and called the sheriff. He couldn't help but glance at the time. It was almost ten. They probably wouldn't even make it back to the hotel by midnight. Like he was going to make a stupid valentine anyhow!

*

They reached the motel room a lot earlier than Sam figured. It was only eleven thirty. Dean wanted to go to the bar across the street and his dad wanted to get a shower and get some sleep. Sam was content to return to the motel room and read a book he had started for a book report that he was never going to write now, but the book was interesting so he decided he might as well finish it. Maybe he could write the report at the next school he ended up enrolled in. John grunted a 'good job' to him as John climbed into bed. Sam sat at the desk reading, but couldn't help but keep glancing at the time.

It was stupid. True love. Yeah. He couldn't even get a girlfriend. They never stayed anywhere long enough and he just couldn't do the ongoing one nighters like Dean could. He supposed Dean would probably pick up a girl tonight and go home with her. He always lilked to get laid after a hunt. Sam missed the old days when he was younger, before Dean would go to the bar but instead stay home with him and they'd watch movies and throw popcorn at each other and wrestle. He had to admit he was a little jealous when a stranger got to steal Dean's time and attention away. He wished he was a little older, a little closer in age to his brother, so they could at least go to he bar together. 

Dean had promised to make him a fake ID, not that Sam couldn't, but Dean was a lot better with the fake ID making. Sam was tall enough but he still looked a little young in the face and knew it. A dark enough bar though...yeah, their dad had forbidden Sam to be in a bar before he was sixteen, at least for drinking. Which was probably _why_ Dean hadn't made him the fake ID yet. Geez he was only like three months from being sixteen. What was the big deal? He'd been in plenty of bars to hustle. He wasn't really crazy about the idea of getting drunk, but to be able to go there with Dean, watch Dean work his magic on everyone, that would have been cool. 

Sam knew Dean got hit on by as many guys as girls. One time Sam thought...well, Dean was in the bathroom longer than normal and the guy who had hit on Dean had followed him in and then came out just after Dean. Okay, maybe a couple of times he had noticed things like that. Like Dean disappearing out the back door of the bar and coming in a few minutes later looking damned pleased with himself. But it was a guy who came back in after Dean, looking rather dishelved and a little...googly-eyed. Dean never did it when their dad was around and Sam always turned a blind eye to it. He also turned a blind eye to how it made him feel, because he couldn't be jealous, not _that_ way because, well, because Dean was his brother. They shared a bed when their dad was around and they were in a motel. And just because a couple times Sam woke up with Dean wrapped around him, obviously dreaming of his latest conquest, the way it made him feel was just...embarrassing. Yeah. Especially when they were both sporting woodies.

Sam looked at the clock again. True Love. Oh what the hell. What did he have to lose? Maybe Peter would be right and he'd find that special someone. Peter didn't say how long it would take. It could be years Peter was talking about finding his own true love in fifteen years! Who knew. Like it was even going to work. He went ahead and dug into his backpack and got a sheet of paper. He had some markers from his art class and pulled them out too. He drew a heart and then chewed on his lip. What did he want to say? 'Roses are Red violets are blue, Be my only and I'll hump you?' Uh, no. That was more Dean's style. How about something simple like 'Be mine forever'? 

He stared at the heart and finally began to write. 'It only happens once they say, true love is rare, but if you find this and if you dare, be my valentine, my one, my only, my valentine, mine.' He licked his lips. Yeah, kinda sappy, but he liked it. He quickly colored the heart in with red except around the lettering, leaving it white around the black verse. He drew little hearts around all around the edges in red and looked at the time. Eleven fifty nine. What else...Oh yeah. Glancing over at his dad, he saw John was asleep. He quickly kissed the valentine right in the middle, right on the letters, and just like when Peter kissed him, he swore he felt his lips tingle. He looked at the valentine and shook his head, laughing at himself for being so stupid. Folding up the card, he tossed it in his pack with his book. Well, he might as well get some sleep too. No telling when his brother was going to come in. If he came in that night.

 

* * * 

[Three Days Later]

Dean and Sam helped their dad load the truck. Seeing the rather cool good bye Sammy gave his dad, Dean knew his younger brother was pissed off. Dad had rented this small house in bumfuck Ohio, and announced he'd be back in a week to three weeks. It made no sense for Sam to enroll in school, so little brother was going to do 'home study' for the couple weeks that they were here. Yeah... Sam's bitchface, and the way he got out of there as quick as he could told Dean how mad Sammy was about this. He'd find a way to make it up to him.

He stepped up and gave their dad a hug and listened to his usual instructions about taking care of Sam and not getting distracted. Nodding, he waited until his dad drove away and he couldn't see the truck anymore. He wished they'd gotten the Impala out of storage so he'd have a ride while their dad was gone, but no such luck. Sighing, he turned and headed for the house.

His boots crunched over the sand and gravel surface in front of the house and he almost slipped on something and looked down. Huh. Bending over, he picked up the paper, and looked at it as he walked in, a smirk pulling at his lips as he recognized the handwriting. "... true love is rare, but if you find this and if you dare, be my valentine, my one, my only, my valentine, mine," Dean read out loud in a mocking voice as he approached Sam in the living room. "Awww Sammy's in love. Who is it? That short blonde I saw you with at Starbucks?" he asked, waggling his brows, then as an afterthought, blowing a kiss to his younger brother.

Sam's head snapped up hearing Dean read the words from the valentine he'd made. He hadn't been able to find it when they reached Ohio and figured it was well on its way to his true love or the dumpster, one of the two. Dean looked far too happy with himself. Blonde, what blonde? That seventy year old woman he helped when she dropped her purse? That was so not funny.

He felt his face turn scarlet as he stomped over to Dean and reached to snatch the valentine from Dean's hands. "None of your business! Gimme that back!"

"Nah huh... not until you spill, Sammy... who is she?" he demanded, tugging the paper this way, then holding it high, then moving it away again, laughing as his brother tried to get it. "Come on bro, just tell me," he shook his head, getting happier as Sam seemed to get madder.

"No!" Sam fumed as he jumped for it, trying to steal it back. Dean was having entirely too much fun at his expense. "Gimme it back!" Sam demanded. Screw this, he thought. The next time he stepped in and Dean dodged away, Sam slipped his leg between Dean's and wrapped it around Dean's leg, then tackled him so they both fell to the wooden floor of the old house. Sam was grimly pleased when he ended up on top and heard Dean's 'whuff' as Dean's body cushioned Sam's weight. He reached for the valentine that Dean still held up and away.

"Sonova..." Cursing, Dean fought to keep the paper away, and then curled his own leg around Sam's for leverage and rolled so he was on top. "Uh uh, first you tell me, Sammy," he kept the paper away, but had to use his entire body, his weight, to hold Sam's struggling form down. Damn... he was stubborn. "Did you kiss her?" He licked his own lips as his gaze dropped to Sam's, then snapped back up to meet a fiery glare. "Come on... I won't tease, I swear... who's your valentine, Sam?"

"Yes you will. You'll make all sorts of fun of me." Sam struggled to get out from under Dean and get the valentine back. He wriggled in his effort to escape and was suddenly very aware that their groins were...perfectly...aligned. His fury meshed with sudden embarrassment when he had a reaction a brother just wasn't suppose to have. Lunging suddenly he managed to grab hold of the paper and felt the electricity shoot through him ten times stronger than Peter's kiss or from when he had kissed the valentine. After a moment he let it go. "Fine, keep the damned thing. It was stupid anyhow."

His brother's sudden capitulation and defeat took Dean by surprise. He let the paper drop from his fingers and cupped Sam's chin. "It's not stupid. I just... you used to tell me everything. I don't like it when you... when you shut me out," he said. The moment the words left him, he felt naked and vulnerable. Damn Sam for... for whatever knack it was that he had getting him to say things he didn't intend to. His eyes locked with his brother's, and suddenly he wanted nothing more than to just... just kiss away that frown. _The hell_... Sucking in his breath, he started to get off his brother, suddenly sharply away that he was hard... that they both were.

Sam was shocked by the words coming out of Dean's mouth, by the touch and almost hurt he saw in his brother's eyes. The way Dean held his chin, the way he looked at him, like...like...noooo. Sam grabbed hold of Dean to keep him from moving away. "I'm not shutting you out. You don't tell me about your girls." He rolled his eyes. "Well, except for maybe their cup sizes. I...miss you. You're always going out to the bar and hustling and shit. We haven't had a movie night in forever. Or a popcorn fight. Or any fight that we weren't, I dunno, like really fighting over something."

"We haven't?" Dean didn't notice those kinds of things, but he suddenly knew he had to get off Sam... would say anything to put some space between them. It was one thing to get blow jobs from random guys now and again, but feeling like this about his... no fucking way. Abruptly, he pulled the rest of the way off, his jacket slipping through his brother's tight fingers. "We can do that. Anytime you want. Why didn't you say anything?" He licked his lips and stood up. Maybe he should go to a bar... right now. 

Sam didn't want to let Dean go, but Dean didn't give him a choice, practically ripping the jacket from his grasp. "I guess I figured you felt like you needed to get away from me. And Dad and me always fighting. I know you're stuck in the middle. It's not fair to you. Can we...can we do a movie night tonight? Pizza, popcorn, beer, the works?" He held out his hand for Dean to help him to his feet.

Tonight? Dean stuck his hand out and hauled Sam up to his feet, steadying him before he collided bodily into him, which wouldn't be a good thing right now. "Not your job to worry about that stuff. You ah..." he scratched his head and put a little distance between them. "You want to go to the movies?" The way he was feeling, it might be better to be out than alone with Sam. Sam was right, part of the reason he went out a lot was... he didn't even want to think about the reasons. If he did, they'd just drive him nuts.

"No, I want to rent like four movies, and get a box of microwave popcorn and beer and then get a pizza and come back here." Sam leaned down and picked up the valentine. No electric shock this time. He shook his head, tossed it on the table, and turned back to Dean. "I guess we oughtta have the pizza delivered since we have to hoof it, huh? The video rental place isn't real far and we can get the popcorn there, and then we'll stop at that gas-mart on the way back where you can get the beer. We'll order the pizza when we get back. You can even choose two of the movies."

"Don't you think that's a little extreme? Four movies, Sam?" Seeing his brother didn't look like he was about to relent, Dean resolved to just grin and bear it. They'd each lay down on a separate couch, and by then he would forget what 'squirmy Sam' felt like under him. And tomorrow, he'd go and scratch that itch... and it would all be all right. Sure it would.

Walking across the room, he grabbed his jacket off the back of a chair. "Well what are you waiting for?"

*

Twenty minutes later, they were in the vid store picking movies. As Sam reached for one of the 'new releases,' Dean shook his head. "You get that chick flick and I'm going right to sleep. Seriously, dude... action, shit blowing up... that's what we need."

Sam rolled his eyes. "This has won all sorts of awards. It's not chick-flick. Fine, whatever." He grabbed another one and showed it for Dean's approval. At Dean's nod, he took it, then perused a few more and picked up another action one. He saw Dean had grabbed a classic monster movie, what a surprise, and the other one he wasn't sure what it was. Probably a bad sci-fi one or something. After snagging some popcorn and candy, he plopped everything onto the counter. Dean added his selections and after paying, they headed out. Sam carried the stuff since Dean would be carrying the beer. While they were at the gas-mart Sam grabbed one of those local coupon ad books and flipped through it. Yahtzee! A coupon for pizza!

Sam honestly couldn't believe how good a mood he was in. Dean was actually staying in tonight. They were going to have a brothers night. That was just too awesome. He promised himself he would not pick a fight with Dean. Even if Dean started being an ass...well, it was Dean so that would probably happen at some point. He laughed to himself...the valentine probably wasn't going to find him true love, but at least because of it he was getting a brothers-only night with Dean. That was worth the whole feeling silly bit. Seeing a pay phone outside Sam stepped out while Dean was getting the beer and placed the pizza order and told them there would be an extra tip if it was hot. They should just be getting settled in when the pizza arrived.

Dean came out with the bag, complaining loudly. "I got carded, can you believe it?" He was just in time to see Sam put the receiver down and raised an eyebrow. "Is it the valentine chick? I'm gonna get her name," he promised, giving his brother a determined look before punching him on the arm and starting the walk back. It was weird. Dean did want to know her name. He wanted Sam to come out of his shell... not that anyone could really tell he was in it, his brother had no problems talking to girls. He connected up with them real well, but he connected on a friend level rather than in preparation of a hook up. He knew Sam wanted more, wanted to experiment. So yeah... he wanted what his brother wanted, for Sam.

And yet... Despite the fact he pushed Sam towards every pretty girl that might work, there was always something inside Dean that was damned grateful that Sam wasn't just like him. He felt guilty about feeling that way. Most days he could justify it by telling himself it's because he didn't think there was anyone out there that was good enough for Sam, or that unlike him, Sam would probably turn what should be a short fling into a 'forever type love thing.' Tonight, those reasons weren't working for him. He stole a look at his brother from under his lashes and knew, he was just glad that whenever he got home, from wherever, or from whoever, he liked knowing Sam was there... not out with some chick, he was home _waiting._

He was gonna go crazy if he kept wondering about his feelings, so Dean just stopped. "I got you some coke. Under age and all..."

Sam huffed in annoyance at Dean's comment about the valentine. "No, I ordered us our pizza. It's only fifteen minutes to the house, so I figured it'll get there about the time we've got the movie in and settled and stuff. I got us a deluxe, extra cheese, with the meatlover on your half and extra veggies on my half. Since the second pizza is half price, I got us another, just a regular deluxe. Figured pizza for lunch tomorrow would be good."

He thumped Dean in the arm. "Coke's good for tomorrow, but I'm having beer tonight so I hope you got enough." He might not be that crazy about beer, but tonight, he wanted to have a couple. He wanted to have a couple and relax and just share it all with his brother. 

"Aw, didn't your looks get you a discount?" he teased Dean. It had been some old guy at the counter, so Sam wasn't surprised. "And carded." Sam gave an exaggerated gasp. "Imagine that. Think the fact we're walking might have something to do that? I can't believe Dad didn't let you get the car out. The grocery store is like six miles from here. Guess he wants to make sure we get our morning runs in, huh? And running with a full pack. That's gonna suck."

"I know. I can't believe _you're_ gonna have to do our grocery runs, but it'll be good for you, make you all buff," Dean started to grin, then looked down. Stupid joke made him think of all of the changes in Sam's body. He'd shot right up and was lanky, but his muscles were forming, and sometimes when his shirt pulled up, or when he was doing his push ups, Dean had to fight to keep his eyes off him, to not wonder what it would feel like to run his hands up Sam's body. Those were the times he'd go find himself a blow job... always a brunet. Light eyed if he could manage it. He let out a hot, tortured breath. Maybe he'd liquor himself up tonight.

Sam bumped into him with his shoulder. "I don't think so, jerk. If I'm running to the grocery store, so are you. Otherwise you'll end up with salads and tuna for your meals," he threatened. "And I'll get you turkey bacon for breakfast, and whole wheat bread. Maybe even those fake eggs. Ooo, and tofu burgers with soy cheese." He grinned at Dean. "And you _know_ I'll do that."

When Sam bumped into his brother, he caught the scent of Dean's aftershave mixed with the faded smell of leather. Leather always made Sam think of Dean. Leather and Dean...he blinked. Jesus, he shouldn't be having thoughts like that. Especially not the images that came into his mind, of Dean in tight leather pants, bare chested, leaning on a pool cue and crooking a finger at Sam to come closer, promising to teach him everything. And it would have nothing to do with pool except maybe as a flat surface used for anything but shooting balls. Shooting balls. That just brought up a whole new batch of images. Dean still in his leather pants but the bulge Sam had seen there at times was prominant. The tight leather leaving nothing to the imagination and Dean whispering he'd teach Sammy to shoot. Shoot his cum halfway across the room. 

God, he had daydreams he would never ever admit to sometimes but never like this. Not this vivid, not this intense. He needed to get his head on straight. Dean would positively freak if he knew sometimes Sam thought about him that way. Yeah, nothing awkward there.

Yeah, Sam would keep that promise of health food, Dean thought. "Bitch," Dean shot back. When there was no answer, he looked at Sam, but couldn't read little brother's expression. "Dollar for your thoughts, fiver if they're dirty," he said. He kept forgetting the danger of certain topics and their affects on him, but he was used to talking with Sam a certain way and it was hard to break out of it.

Sam looked up at Dean and felt a blush crawl up his face, but then straightened and managed a grin. "Fiver. I was thinking of a pool table and leather and sex. Hand it over, bro." Good god, did he just tell his brother he was having a sexual fantasy? He felt his blush deepen, but held his hand out anyway. If he admitted to it, Dean was going to pay up.

"That's impossible, you don't daydream like that... you daydream about books and... and ... research and shit...." Dean said, giving Sam a piercing look. "I don't believe you... details," he demanded. "I'm not paying for something you just made up." 

"I do not dream about books. You think I steal your skin mags to read the articles? I'm almost sixteen, Dean. Of course I think about sex. I just don't...I haven't yet, okay?" He gave Dean something of a condescending look. "And I'm not the one who could make that daydream up off the cuff like that. That would be you."

Dean had meant little brother hadn't really given any details but, whatever.

"You want details? Fine. But this is all you're getting. Tight leather pants, built like-like-like someone who works out and has it all in all the right places. Dark blonde to brown hair. Short. And promises of what we can do on the pool table. You can fill in the blanks while you dig out my fiver."

"You like short?" Dean laughed at that and put his arm around Sam and whispered close to his ear. "You are a freak." But when he let go of him, Sam's words, his daydream stuck with Dean. Only instead of some short blonde that was stacked, he saw himself with Sam, pushing him onto the pool table and telling him they'd play ball.

When Dean grabbed him and whispered in his ear, he practically held his breath. The air rushed out of him when Dean called him a freak. That...wasn't what he wanted to hear.

Grimacing, Dean produced a five dollar bill out of his wallet. "Is it sick I'm sharing your damned day dream?" he asked for shock value.

"Just mean's you're a freak too," Sam shot back maybe a little hurt. But Dean was sharing his day dream? He looked over at his brother. "You get your fiver back if you tell me the details of how you're sharing my day dream. Sharing mean's I'm in it. Sam leaned in and whispered. "So how am I in your dream?" he breathed into his brother's ear. He knew it wouldn't be what he was dreaming about, about Dean having him on the table, running his hands all over him, kissing him. And promising more. But he still wanted to know.

"Sharing means..." With the heat of Sam's breaths fanning his ear, Dean suddenly couldn't think and answered on automatic. "I'm the _not so short_ blond in the dream. I get hella horny, and the leather pants get too fucking tight. I push..." he had his palm flat in front of him and made the motion of shoving someone's chest, "then climb up on the pool table on my knees, straddling that hot bod, and undoing my zipper..." right next to your mouth... Dean blinked. "X rated after that bro, give me the fiver," he pulled it out of Sam's hand. "And I didn't say it features you," he lied through his teeth, wishing he had a private moment to really think that daydream through while he brought himself off.

"I meant short hair, like yours, not short person," Sam responded without thinking, his mouth suddenly going dry, a small sound breaking in the back of his throat over Dean's description of the fantasy. It was like he could feel the pool table beneath him, feel Dean's hand on his chest pushing him back. The smell of leather filled his nose as he imagined Dean straddling him, imagined the budging pants and the sound of the zipper opening. His hands went sweaty as he imagined himself opening up those pants and reaching in, freeing Dean from that silken black leather. The precum glistened on Dean's tip and he licked it away...

A little over two years ago Sam had really begun to hit puberty. That was when he had started _noticing_ girls. ...And Dean. He remembered Dean coming out of the bathroom naked, apparently thinking Sam was still asleep. He'd been dreaming...about Dean...and woke up to hear soft grunts and groans just barely audible over the sounds of the shower. He'd been hard as a rock when he woke up and had taken hold of himself with his own hand, a groan slipping from his lips. He stroked himself, biting his lower lip hard to keep from making sounds so he could hear Dean, jacking himself off in time to the groans coming from the bathroom. When he heard that last long groan, knowing Dean was cumming, he felt his own cum spill over his hand as he released so fucking hard he was arching, aching for hands to be on him. That was the first time he had tasted his own cum, bringing his hand to his mouth, covering it in horror, realizing he had just jacked himself off imagining it was Dean doing the stroking. He had thoughtlessly licked away the wetness from his lips as he wiped his hand clean in the sheets. Realizing it was his own cum, the thought of how Dean might taste took over his thoughts. Dean walked out a few minutes later, his chest still damp and glistening in the dim lighting, water droplets still in his hair. He could see Dean's cock bouncing as he walked and if he hadn't just come, knew he would have gotten hard all over again. He buried his head in his pillow and groaned. Dean had swatted his ass and told him it was time to get up. 

By the end of that week he had found a junior in the nearby high school that dressed in a leather coat, had short spikey hair and blue eyes--well, no one was perfect--and cornered the guy after school when he was alone and offered to blow him. The guy had almost told him to fuck off but Sam had hurriedly added the guy didn't have to touch him, didn't have to kiss him. All he had to do was stand there and let Sam blow him. The guy agreed and Sam gave his first blow job. Within a couple months and a couple different schools, Sam was getting pretty good at blowing a guy. He'd learned to swallow down a guy's dick, learned how to keep himself balanced as a guy fucked his mouth, learned to swallow down every drop of cum and how to milk a guy dry. He thought it was funny he could walk up to a guy and easily ask to blow the guy or give him a hand job, but he got nervous trying to ask a girl out. If he wsn't trying to hit on her he was okay, but try to ask her out and he was all stutters and awkwardness. A year ago was the first time a guy had kissed him, had sucked on his nipples and blown him. That same guy had stuck his finger up Sam's ass and stroked his prostate as he came. He hadn't let anyone do more than fingerfuck him though. That was something he just wasn't willing to do. He also only blew guys that had the right look, the leather, and refused to acknowledge he was imagining Dean every time he blew a guy. 

And he still hadn't kissed a girl.

Sam felt the heat pooling in his groin from Dean's description of the daydream. He cleared his throat as Dean took back his fiver. Okay, he'd earned it back, that was for sure. Glancing over at Dean, he just couldn't help but admire his brother's body. He was torturing himself and he knew it. He wanted to offer Dean a fiver for the x-rated details and a description of that girl he was fucking but...he didn't really want to hear about Dean's perfect girl. It would just make him angry that it wasn't him. Okay, that decided it. He was getting drunk tonight because his mind was finally waving all the little flags that he just couldn't ignore any more. He wanted his brother to fuck him and that was just wrong. He hardly thought about it as he reached into the hidden pocket in his coat, his fingers slipping inside the box and fishing out a cigarette and lighter. He lit up and took a deep drag on it to try and calm himself. Then he saw Dean gaping at him and wondered why before realizing what he had just done. Oh crap, if Dean told their dad he was fucking toast. He would be running laps for hours.

"Uhm, wanna hit?" he asked sheepishly, offering the cigarette to Dean, expecting Dean to knock it out of his hand and tell him how much trouble he was going to be in when Dad got back.

"You _smoke_? You have sex daydreams and now you smoke and drink too? You're gonna give me a fucking heart attack," he muttered, glaring at his younger brother who was growing up way too fast. It was probably his influence too, so not like he could totally blame him. "Nah... but I'll have one with my beer, later." 

"I only smoke occassionally!" Sam protested, which was true. He made absolutely certain not to smoke if he even suspected their dad would be home soon. And he only smoked outside where he could make sure to keep the smoke out of his clothes for the most part. "The life we lead, I can't believe we all don't chain smoke or something," he muttered. "And so what, I have like a couple beers a month. And you can't tell me you don't have sex daydreams. I'm not ten anymore, Dean." He shut up when Dean's last words registered. "You...you smoke too?" 

He still couldn't believe Sammy was smoking. It was a mistake, watching him that closely. The way baby brother pushed the cigarette past his lips, holding it there as he lit up had Dean practically coming in his pants. He held his breath and couldn't help imagining it was his cock Sam was taking between his lips, right there on that pool table. How many times had he fucked the mouth of a brunet that reminded him of Sam.... just once, if he could have the real thing, maybe this craziness would stop.

Blinking, Dean took a deep breath. Yeah, this stay at home with Sam night idea was so not good. He shouldn't have agreed. He should have done what he'd been doing for a long time, escaped from these feelings by avoiding time alone with him. Oh for crying out loud... now Sam pulled the stick out of his mouth and licked his lips, and Dean couldn't fucking drag his gaze away or help the soft moan that broke from him.

Sam glanced over at Dean when he heard Dean's groan and saw the way Dean's gaze was fastened on the cigarette. He gave him a strange look and told him he could have a hit from it. Then he dropped the cigarette lower and realized Dean wasn't looking at the cigarette but at Sam's lips. His eyebrows lifted and he licked his lips again a little more slowly. He knew that look. He had seen it on the guys he'd blown or was getting ready to blow. Dean was thinking...nah. Sam was the only one screwed up like that, wanting his brother in a way he shouldn't. He took a few more drags off the cigarette and flicked it away into the road, red embers bouncing along the pavement. 

He'd sometimes blow a guy for a pack of smokes. The way he and his dad fought, sometimes he just needed the rebellion of smoking and the soothing of his raw nerves that a cigarette offered. He wanted to ask Dean so many things, but they just weren't things that were cool to ask. You didn't ask your brother, who you knew, or at least suspected, swung both ways, what sort of guys he liked. Besides, he was afraid Dean would start asking him questions that he was afraid he wouldn't lie very well about. And he wasn't about to blurt out he lusted after his own brother. No. This was movie night. Brothers hanging out. That's all it was going to be.

Switching the pack of beer from one hand to the other, Dean rubbed the back of his neck and steadfastly tried to look at the sidewalk instead of at Sam. As the silence between them grew, he stole a glance at Sam who seemed to be lost in his own world. But then he saw his brother look at him, his gaze immediately darting away, and started to wonder if there wasn't some two way tension going on here. Maybe Sam felt or knew what he was feeling and was embarrassed or disgusted or...

They arrived at the house, and he went first, unlocking the door and letting Sam inside. He started to pull the screen door closed just as the pizza was delivered. Sam took it inside, and Dean put the beers in the fridge, pulling two out for them and heading for the living room. Sam was sitting on the floor, in front of the coffee table. Dean joined him, but made sure there was some space between them. He set the beer down next to his brother, and knocked back some of his own. It was gonna be a long night...

Sam already had the movie primed by the time Dean joined him on the floor. As soon as Dean settled he started the movie. He handed Dean a couple paper towels to use as napkins then opened the pizza box and pulled out a piece that was obviously from his half rather than Dean's. He took a bite of the steaming hot pie and the cheese stretched out between his mouth and the pizza. He grinned at Dean and laughed as he broke the cheese with his fingers, tilted his head back and stuff the extra cheese into his mouth. 

"Mmmmm, s'good," Sam said around his mouthful. After he chewed and swallowed, he took a drink of the beer. Okay, even if he wasn't a great big fan of beer, pizza and beer went pretty good together. He thumped his fist playfully into Dean's arm. "You're awesome. Thanks for staying in tonight and doing this...Jerk," he teased.

The moan? It was entirely unnecessary, Dean thought, glaring at Sam and trying _not_ to keep thinking about that damned pool game scenario now wedged firmly in his mind. "I am ... awesome," he said a little tightly, lifting his bottle to his mouth and drinking down a good half of it. He needed to loosen up, needed to right now. Reaching out, he tussled Sam's hair, just the way he had when Sam had been a little kid. "You too kiddo," he said, forcing a smile.

Sam watched as Dean up ended the beer seeing those sweet lips of his brothers around that bottle neck, and drinking down, down, down. Sam tried hard not to stare, but his mind made all sorts of suggestions and vivid imaginings. His brother messing up his hair broke him out of his daydream and Sam batted at Dean's hand. "Not ten," he grouched.

Sam could tell Dean was all tense and tight. He watched the movie a few more minutes as he finished off that first piece of pizza then stood and pushed the coffee table out of the way and shoved his couch up closer. He grabbed another piece of pizza and moved his beer back by the couch, setting the pizza on a napkin on the cushion. Sliding in behind Dean he straddled him and began massaging Dean's shoulders. "I know I'm not as much fun as some busty Asian beauty, but Dude, at least relax some. You're tied up tighter than Dad's shorts when I piss him off."

"Sam!" Dean's head jerked back, his heart suddenly banging against his chest as he felt Sam surround him. Fuck, those long, lean legs were pressed against the outer edges of Dean's own body and Sam's package was practically up against his ass. He slid forward and ground out. "Not ten." This had been fine when Sam was a kid, and would have been fine now too if Dean wasn't having these fucked up needs, if his mind weren't playing games with him, making him want to push back against that knot against his ass to see if he could get Sam hard again, like when they'd been wrestling over that valentine card.

Sam froze with startlement. "What is your issue? I give you neck and shoulder massages after a hunt if you don't disappear to a bar right away." Dammit, he was just trying to be a good brother. If he just happened to really enjoy giving Dean a massage, so what? Sam pushed himself back to standing and settled down on the couch. "Have I...what have I done Dean? You don't hang out with me anymore, and I get it that I'm not riveting entertainment and maybe bitch too much but sometimes I come into a room and you practically run from me." Sam picked his beer up off the floor and downed the rest of it as he settled back on the cushions. "I know Dad and I fight a lot but...what can I do to make you...be my brother again? No, wait, forget it. That's probably too chick-flick for you. I just want to have a movie night and hang. I don't want to piss you off and I don't want to fight." No what Sam really wanted to do was kiss his brother's neck as he gave him a massage, run his hands over Dean's chest and then drop them lower until he was rubbing Dean's groin

What the fuck? Yeah, he really wanted him and Dean to do stuff that they never could, but these feelings and thoughts just usually didn't come on as strong as they were. He needed another beer and needed to chill. 

Dean cradled his forehead in his hand and took a deep breath as the truth of Sam's words came crashing down on him, and with it... guilt. "It's not you Sammy, I swear, it's not you bro... it's me," he said in a low, anguished voice. He felt the cushions move next to him as Sam settled down again, and instantly missed the warmth of his body and the way he made him feel alive, even though it was a world of hurt, being unable to respond the way his body seemed to insist he should.

He glanced over at Sam's empty bottle, then at his own, and then at his brother's face. "Sorry. I'll get us more drinks, and I'll chill out, I swear. Got something on my mind, but I'm handling... all right?" He forced himself not to stare at Sam's lips, forced himself to push up and head for the kitchen.

When he opened the fridge, the cold air felt good against his flushed skin. Maybe it would have him thinking straight again. Brother. Younger brother... fucking off limits. What kind of emotional fuck up would want what he craved? Grabbing the beers, he went back inside, twisting them open and, after pulling the coffee table closer, setting one down by Sam. He moved the pizza up to the coffee table as well.

Their eyes locked again, and he was afraid that he'd hurt Sam. If Sam was really thinking the things he'd said. Dropping down to the ground, crouching in front of his brother, he spoke. "You don't have to do anything... I never stopped being your brother, I don't know how to stop being your _brother._."

Sam couldn't help himself. It was girlie but he did it anyhow. He cupped the side of Dean's face. "Then tell me what's on your mind. Share with me. Remember you said I used to tell you everything? You used to tell me stuff too. Especially after I read Dad's journal and found out what really happened and what Dad really did when he was away. Cause you might say you're handling it, but it's apparently been on your mind a long time. Dad's gone for a while. It's just you and me. Tell me what's wrong. Whatever it is, I won't be mad, I won't get pissy or bitchy or anything. _Tell me,_ " Sam begged.

He was tempted. God he was tempted, to get this bitch off his chest. Maybe if he saw the hate in his brother's eyes, the shock, maybe it would shame him into getting rid of these unwanted feelings once and for all. But a part of him knew, he'd never get over it... over seeing anything but love and respect in his brother's eyes... its the only place he got that, and if he lost it too...

He pulled his face away. "Let it go Sam. Some things, they're best pushed down and forgotten. Trust me on this," he said thickly. Seeing that stubborn tilt to his brother's chin, he tried to change the subject. "How about a smoke now, I could use one with my beer."

It hurt Sam when Dean pulled away, but in part it was because he didn't want to lose that physical connection to his brother. Dean's words, his tone, whatever it was, it was eating him up from the inside out. Dean was really good at repressing shit, but eventually it was going to catch up with him and with the way Winchester luck went, it would catch up with him at a really bad time.

"If it's tearing you up this bad, and has been for how long? Then you need to talk about it. I won't tell anyone." Sam grabbed his coat, pulled out the cigarettes, handed one to him, then lit one for himself and held out the lighter. "Look...if it's about...you, uhm, sampling both sides of the fence, I already know that."

"What?" The air wooshed out of Dean and he dropped the cigarrette. Thank God it wasn't lit. He wouldn't look at Sam as he searched for it in the crack of the couch, where the cushions met the back. "You don't know what you're talking about, why don't you just shut the fuck up."


	2. Chapter 2

Sam winced at the anger he heard in Dean's words. He asked, his voice pained and small, "You think it's wrong then, to...like guys as well as girls?" He clenched his jaw. If Dean ever found out he liked guys...at least guys that reminded him of his brother--and that was all sorts of wrong right there--Dean would probably disown him. He felt his heart fall into his stomach at the thought.

"I don't think anything about it, all right? Goddamit. What's with the fucking third degree?" What had Sam seen? What did he know... how much of it. Shit, he should have been more careful. Little brother was the observant one. He'd found out about monsters... why shouldn't he find out about this? He glanced at Sam, searching his face for revulsion, but baby brother had his face schooled to be neutral. _Except for the pain in his eyes._

A muscle pulsed in Dean' jaw. "What I do or don't do... it's got nothing to do with you." Hand shaking slightly, he put the tip of his cigarette to the end of Sam's, then leaning in sucked on his to light up.

The whole brothers hanging out together night was pretty well ruined and Sam figured it was pretty much his fault. He had always wondered if maybe Dean had started avoiding him because...maybe Dean found out baby brother was giving out blow jobs. That was pretty close to the time it started happening. That was also the time Dean had started nudging him toward more and more girls. Sam sucked in a deep drag of the cigarette and blew it out. "It's okay with me if you like guys, Dean." Waiting for the great big elephant in the room to trample him, he added softly, "I do, too." 

Reeling like he'd been struck, Dean stared at Sam for a long moment. Something clenched around his heart, taking away his ability to speak. Pulling the cigarette out of his mouth, he blew out smoke rings, one, after another, after another, until he was out of breath. He licked his lips, then had to ask. "Is it because... because of me?" He finally had the courage to look into Sam's eyes again. "You following in my footsteps?" That was something Sam had always done. Had he seen, then tried?

Sam paled. Dean knew? Dean suspected? Wait...following in his footsteps? "You think I decided to try out guys because you sometimes went out back with a guy instead of girl?" Sam asked incredulously. "Shit, if I was 'following in your footsteps' I'd have at least had the nerve to kiss a girl by now. Guys are...look, I like both okay? It's just...easier to get a quick fix with a guy. Girls are way more complicated. At least girls my age, I can't convince to go out back and give me a blow job like you can with girls at the bar. Not that I seem to be able to do much more than stutter and act goofy around girls I like anyhow. I'm not sure, but I think I already had a thing for guys before I ever figured out you did it with guys sometimes." Sam picked at a loose thread on the cushion then looked back up to meet his brother's green eyes. "You okay with me liking guys?"

"Yeah. No!" Dean closed his eyes, and blew out another stream of smoke, trying to buy time. To think. "I don't really want to think about you and anyone right now. Do what you want Sammy, I'm _always_ good with that." He was was having trouble dealing with the images of Sam getting blow jobs from random guys. Sure, he did that himself, but Sam? Sam who made valentine's cards and had dreams of forever? It wasn't just that, yeah he was fucking jealous, and he'd have to make sure he never saw Sam going off cause yeah... his fist wanted to meet the faces of these random dudes so fucking bad.

Dean took another puff, then leaning forward, put the stub out on the cigarette box. He really should have opted to go out.

Sam could see how it was twisting Dean up inside. Great. Just swell. He was such an idiot. "No Dean, you're not good with it," Sam said sadly. "But that's okay. I don't blame you...let's just watch our movies and get drunk and we can pretend tonight never happened. And I won't ask for anything stupid like this again, okay? Or look, if you want to go out, then go on." He dredged up a smile. "I'll watch movies and eat pizza and you can go get laid. Just don't get drunk and get in a fight or something okay?" Sam picked up his beer and drank about a quarter of it down before putting his slice of pizza back in the box. He didn't really want it right now. He'd save it for later. He turned and focused on the movie that they'd missed most of so far.

Dean didn't answer, but settled back with a beer, eyes staring at the tube. He had no idea what was happening in the movie, and didn't care. He wished he'd gone out, but leaving now wasn't gonna do it for him either. Eventually, the words he wanted to say and meant with all his heart worked their way out of his mouth. "I don't want to give _this_ up, us up, not for anything, and not over anything. It's just hard right now, and I'll get a grip on it, it'll be fine." He looked over at Sam. "It'll be just like it always was, I swear." Yeah, he was gonna pull his shit together and treat Sam right. 

Dean suddenly speaking up after the long silence had Sam looking over at Dean in surprise. He really had expected Dean to do what he always did when he was upset. Grab his coat and leave, slamming the door behind him. Dean's words helped ease the ache in his chest. After a moment of hesitation Sam did something he hadn't done in years. He stretched out and put his head on Dean's lap, just like he had done when he was five or six and needed reassurance everything was going to be okay. He didn't give a shit he was fifteen. it didn't change his need for reassurance. 

"Okay Dean. I don't want to ever give you up either. You mean everything to me. Everything."

"Same." He sniffed, and ran his hand through Sam's hair, the muscle in his jaw still jumping every once in a while. He'd promised, and he would damned well keep his promise. With the force of iron will, he made his body to relax, one inch at a time, forced himself to keep touching Sam without recoiling, without thinking of him sexually, just telling himself this was his brother... same as he'd always been, before these crazy notions started to torture him. 

They both seemed to relax, though they weren't talking. Dean thought Sam might be engrossed in the movie, while it hadn't caught his interest much. At some point, he got up and brought more beers over. He hadn't expected Sam to drink again, but he did, and Dean didn't say a damned thing. 

When the credits started to roll, Sam got up and changed the video. Dean shifted around, stretched and sat back with his legs open. As Sam backed up toward the sofa, they both looked dumbfounded. It looked like someone had swapped vids and a porn was playing.

Sam stared at the screen. He had only watched porn a couple times at some of the motels they were at, but that porn was soft porn. This was no holds barred explicit, hard core, those dicks had to be in the Guiness Book of world records porn. And it was gay porn. Guy on guy. And the video apparently wasn't rewound because the men were kissing, their dicks were hard, erect, and one was getting ready to push into the other. 

Sam continued to walk backwards, eyes locked on the screen, locked on the one who was about to shove into his lover, because damned if the guy didn't look just a little--not a lot--but just a little like Dean. He didn't realize the couch was so close and bumped into it, falling back and down, right into Dean's lap.

Dean yelped as Sam's ass collided with his erection, his arms automatically going around Sam, crossing over his chest and holding him in place to prevent him from wiggling... or anything like that. His heart banged against his chest, his face pressed against the back of his young brother's neck and a shudder of pure need ripped through him. "Oh God...." passed through his lips as he closed his eyes tight, trying desperately to find that peace he'd found earlier. 

Sam had to admit, being on his third beer he wasn't as sharp as he could be but there really wasn't any doubt that Dean was hard, his cock pressed up against Sam's ass, and Sam countered Dean's yelp with a groan. The way Dean's arms were wrapped so tightly around him and the feel of Dean's hot sweet breath on his neck just sent shivers through him and blood straight to his cock. He felt Dean's shudder and heard his soft words. Sam wrapped his arms over the top of Dean's and shut his own eyes, savoring the feel of Dean clutching at him, of Dean's hard cock beneath him and Dean's broad muscular chest pressed against his back. 

After another long savoring breath, Sam reached over his shoulder and ran his fingers through Dean's hair. Even though Dean held him firmly down so Sam couldn't squirm or rub against that tempting erection, Sam had enough leeway to turn his head. He saw his brother's eyes were squeezed tightly shut but his face was flushed. Those lips that Sam had so dreamed about were right there, right within reach. If he didn't have any alcohol in him, he probably wouldn't have done it, but on his third beer, and not being a drinker, it gave him a bit of liquid courage. The loud groan he heard on the screen shot straight through him and he twisted his head a little more and brought his lips down over Dean's, his kiss anything but tentative as he licked along the seam of Dean's lips and begged for Dean to let him in.

As Sam's wet tongue dragged across his lips, Dean groaned again. It had to be a trick of his mind, his sick, fucked up mind. And yet it was there, insistent, and he could feel Sam's breath on his face, knew his brother was straining to press against him. "No... goddamit, no Sammy," he snapped. The warning was completely pointless since he was still holding Sam, and his lips were parting, and his tongue darted out to meet his brother's. 

Groaning, almost as if in pain, Dean pushed his tongue past Sam's, into the wet heat of his mouth... the mouth he'd been dreaming about for too long, the mouth he imagined fucking into every time... every fucking time he took one of those guys out to an alley for a quick blow job. It was sick... dirty...perverted... no, not it, _he_ was, because he was kissing his brother, taking his mouth with his tongue, exploring every corner and fucking loving it. 

It was everything Sam had hoped for and more. His brother's tongue was so skilled, so firm and insistent and curious as it explored his mouth. More heat pooled in Sam's groin and his pants were getting uncomfortable. His eyes were shut as he focused soley on the feel and taste and smell of Dean.

Dean tore his mouth away, eyes wild and emotional as he let Sam go. "Fuck... sorry... Sammy I didn't... Christ!" He started to push his brother off his lap too late, way too late to take it back.

Sam only let him push him far enough away that he could turn completely and face Dean. Placing a hand on either side of Dean's face and making Dean look at him, he saw the guilt and shame and almost terror in his brother's eyes. He leaned in and laid a light kiss on Dean's lips as his hand went to his brother's pants and unbuttoned them. "That daydream," he said as he pulled back and then kissed Dean again, "with the pool table," he nipped Dean's lower lip and sucked on it a minute as he started to pull Dean's pants open, "it was you, not some girl. It was you."

"Sam!" Dean gripped his wrist so fast it took him a minute to realize he might be hurting his brother, and lightened his hold. He took a few hot breaths. "We _can't_ do this. What the hell? What happened?" He shook Sam as he asked. "Did I speak in my sleep and give you ideas? What? Cause this isn't normal... we can't both... it's just not fucking possible."

Sam winced at his brother's bruising grip and felt his chest tighten. Dean had probably just been getting off on the porn and Sam had interpreted it all wrong. He wanted Dean to want him as much as he wanted Dean and so he put his wishes on Dean. He felt his face flush as Dean cursed at him and shook him. Sam's gaze snapped up when Dean said 'both.'

"You really do want me?" Sam asked, almost shocked, part of him still sure Dean was going to storm off in disgust and never want to look at Sam again. "So when were any of us ever normal?" Sam said. "The first guy I ever gave a blow job to, I did because he reminded me of you. I imagined he was you. I wanted him to be you. I...always imagine it's you. So I guess, maybe, yeah, I went after guys because of you. But not because you did, but because...I wanted you and knew I couldn't ever have you. I figured you'd ...well freak would be an understatement if you ever found out." 

"'When were we normal' - That's not an excuse," Dean looked up, trying to find some courage, the will to push Sam away, to stop listening to this. To stop his heart from leaping with joy, to feel a sense of wonder that while he was out fucking the mouths of boys who looked like Sam, Sam was giving bjs to guys he thought looked like himself. He tried to get a hold of himself, to get his breathing under control, his mind in order. "Sam... get off, so we can talk. Can't fucking think like this," he groused.

Sam pressed closer, grinding their groins together. "I don't wanna talk and I don't wanna think," Sam said. "I've wanted you forever. Can't we just...?" Sam huffed. No, he was not giving this up. Dean might end up rationalizing this all away. And Sam sure as hell wasn't going to tell him about the valentine. He'd say they were under a spell. Hell, maybe they were but he didn't care. He heard the men on the video grunting and groaning, hearing the slap of bare flesh against bare flesh. Sam wrapped his arms around Dean, pushing him back as he practically welded their lips together, pressing himself against Dean everywhere he could, hating that it wasn't skin against skin. He rubbed his hard erection against Dean's as if trying to show his brother this was real and just how very much he wanted and needed him.

"Oh Gawd..." Dean groaned as Sam clung to him, plastered himself over him, his mouth slip-sliding over Dean's lips. Blood surged to his cock, making it pulse and ache as Sam deliberately rubbed against him, feeding the flames of his desire. He couldn't fight it, God help him, Dean couldn't. Cupping the back of Sam's head, Dean held Sam in place as he pushed his tongue into his brother's waiting mouth, kissing, plundering, taking what he'd needed for so fucking long. Sam tasted... felt just like Dean had imagined. Hot and wild, innocent and wanton, knowing and curious, and it fucking drove Dean to the edge.

His brother's gasps, and the sounds from the tv whipped up Dean's absolute need for the boy in his arms. A thousand thoughts passed through his mind. Reasons this was wrong. Reasons it could not be. Fears for their future. Fears about what he was doing to his brother. But none of it... _none_ of it... would drown out the need, would douse the fires burning in his blood, would stop him from molding Sam's lithe body closer, from raising his own hips in an effort to get impossibly closer. 

A thousand thoughts ran through Sam's mind as well. How Dean felt against him, so hard, so hot, so needy. Dean's kisses were thorough and aggressive and sweet and better than he could have ever imagined. The lingering scent of Dean's jacket, the cigarettes, Dean's shampoo, and his cologne all swept together into the perfect scent of the brother he loved. Dean's hands on him were a dream come true, one he never really believed would ever happen and he had been okay with that. Mostly. He had known he would always long for that forbidden touch but had come to terms with never getting to experience it. But now he was and he wanted to remember the feel of every burning touch forever. 

Sam's tongue suddenly slipped along Dean's and entered his mouth. Dean's gut clenched as a firestorm of need swept through him. Closing both arms tight around his brother, he stood up suddenly, groaning as Sam instinctively wrapped his long legs around him. They moved against each other as he started to walk, banging into the coffee table but hardly feeling it. Staggering slightly, he got to the dining room table and dropped Sam down on the edge. Pulling slightly away, he reached for the hem of his tee and slipped his hands inside, dipping his head down and kissing Sam's throat as he pushed the shirt and made it bunch up at the top of his chest. 

When his brother lifted him so effortlessly he had no idea where Dean planned to go, and he didn't care. So long as Dean continued to hold him and rub against him and act like a lover instead of a brother. Still, it hadn't really been a surprise when he found himself on the dining room table. His daydream flashed vividly into his mind followed on its heels by Dean's counter dream. Then he felt Dean's hands on his bare chest and Sam groaned as his erection stiffened almost painfully in his pants. He whimpered in soft complaint when Dean's lips left his because he did not want to stop kissing Dean but then he felt Dean's lips at his throat. He still had his legs wrapped loosely around Dean and couldn't help tensing, pulling Dean's hips in close to his needy cock. He slipped his own hands under the back of Dean's shirt and one hand slid under Dean's waistband, his middle finger sliding along the crack of Dean's ass while the other moved up Dean's muscular back.

"God Dean, yes, yes," he whispered letting his head fall back to give his brother as much access as he wanted.

"Off, Sam," Dean breathed hotly, this time tugging the tee over Sam's head. His gaze slowly traveled down his brother's bare chest, his tortured eyes meeting his brother's and seeing the same anguish and need. "Sammy." He shrugged off his own over-shirt and pulled his tee shirt off, tossing it away. Heart beating against his chest, he hopped onto the table with his knees straddling Sam's hips, and just like in the day dream, pushed him down on his back. He took Sam's hands and pushed them up and down his own thighs, gaze never breaking away as he released Sam and moved his hand over his own fly.

Sam placed his hands over Dean's and stopped him, shaking his head. He saw the flash of hesitation in Dean's eyes.

"I wanna do it," Sam said, meeting his brother's gaze, his eyes smoldering with sheer desire. He slowly dragged his gaze down Dean's muscular chest, running his hands over Dean's stomach, caressing, and feeling Dean's muscles clench under his touch. He had already undone Dean's button on the couch. Licking his lips he slowly opened the zipper, feeling his heart race faster as each zipper tooth unlatched. Opening Dean's pants revealed the white cotton of his briefs and Sam groaned. This was really happening. Really truly happening. He stroked Dean through the white cotton. His brother's flesh was under there just waiting to be touched, caressed, and licked. How he could get any damned harder he didn't know, but he was. He had never been so damned hard in all his life. He eased the elastic band down, his breath hitching. Dean's cock was there, erect, flushed, and ready, precum already glistening wetly. He ran his finger over that wet tip and then licked his finger free of Dean's sweet essence, moaning. Dean tasted better even than he had dreamed. He curled up enough to blow lightly across Dean's cock, then flicked out his tongue, teasing the slit expertly before swirling his tongue around it's crown.

If he was dreaming, Dean did not want to wake up. Watching Sam taste him, his gut clenched so hard he could scarcely breathe. His eyes were laser focused on Sam, trying to anticipate his every touch, surprised when his brother immediately started to tease his cock, with no hesitation. The site of Sam's pink tongue darting out toward him had him tensing, then groaning as the slick wet tongue slid over his cock. "Oh God... God, Sam, so good," he whispered thickly, leaning in with his hips, afraid to ask Sam to take him fully in his mouth, but unable to rid himself of that image, of that need.

Sam didn't need to touch Dean's cock though he wanted to. Instead he ran his hands up and down Dean's hips as his mouth and tongue licked and sucked and moved around Dean's cock, controlling its every movement, twitch and bounce with just his mouth. He sucked on just the tip, his eyes half shut in pure pleasure as he hummed. He finally pulled his mouth free, but took hold of Dean's cock with his hand then. Like steel, like velvet, Dean's cock was amazing. He slowly stroked it, running his thumb over its tip occasionally. "Pants off. I wanna see all of you. I want to play with your balls, suck on them, rim you, suck you off, and make you come so hard your brain melts."

Dean's entire body thrummed with need and pleasure. His cock pulsed in Sam's mouth, against it, in his hand... each touch sweeter than the last. He was breathing hard, moving his hips mindlessly, trying to get a little pressure but keeping his movements small so he wouldn't push for any more than Sam was willing to give. But Sam's words had him doing a double take, and cocking his head. He swallowed. "How... where did you learn to talk like that?" he asked, fighting to keep from just tearing his jeans off and pushing his cock into Sam's mouth the way he wanted. It bothered him, maybe it shouldn't, but it bothered him that someone else had taught Sam to talk like this... do this.

Sam felt a small blush creep up his cheeks. "Different guys. I always dreamed of making love to you and I wanted to be good, to give you the best, I wanted to know how to give you the best." He leaned in and sucked on Dean's cock, hollowing his cheeks with a groan, licking away the cum before pulling off again. He looked up at Dean. "I never let anyone fuck me, though, just finger me, teaching me what the prostate did, how it could feel. It was amazing. I've imagined how it must feel, to have someone's cock brush it over and over but I wanted to save myself for you. Not that I really thought we'd ever actually do this but I wanted ... I did anyhow. That way I could always dream it was you that took my virginity even if it never happened." He blushed a little more. "I know. Girlie and sappy." 

He ran his mouth along the side of Dean's cock. "So...tell me what you want. You can have anything. What did you always dream of doing with me? Tell me. Do you want to lie there and let me kiss you and suck you off? Or do you want to fuck my mouth? I've never been tied up, either. I'd only ever trust you for something like that. What's your absolute deepest fantasy of me and you together?"

"Nghh..." the sound broke out of Dean as Sam's mouth slipped along his dick, making him crazy with need. So crazy, the truth slipped out. "Being first in your mouth," he said. Course it was an impossible dream now, though he'd imagined it over and over, and with every one of those other guys who took him in their mouths. He licked his lips, and forced a smiled. "No... none of those things... but starting to think little brother has kinks I'm gonna learn about." He knew Sam had asked him to lose the jeans, so he started to back up and got off the table, his eyes never leaving Sam's.

Sam shrugged a little helplessly. "Sorry. But trust me, I wasn't," he laughed a little embarrassed. "Well, let's just say you'll be much happier that I learned how to give a decent blow job. And besides, every time, I always wanted it to be you." Sam watched, his heart pounding as Dean practically slithered out of his jeans. Oh fuck, yeah. Sam pushed himself off the table and went to his knees in front of Dean. He caressed Dean's cock, looking up at Dean with love and desire. He took Dean in his mouth, slowly sliding down further and further until Dean was fully sheathed by his mouth. Holding Dean's hips he began to bob his head, varying his pace, varying between taking Dean all the way in and just part way. One hand went to Dean's balls and fingered them. He pulled his mouth off Dean's cock and played and lapped around Dean's hard shaft and balls, but stroked Dean constantly with his hand. When Dean wasn't able to keep his hips still, Sam smiled and went back down on Dean, sucking and working him. He finally wrapped his arms loosely around Dean's hips and opened his mouth wide in obvious invitation.

Dean was having trouble processing. This was his brother's mouth his dick was disappearing inside. All those time, all those guys he'd selected, whose mouths he'd fucked... they'd all been Sam. It had always been about Sam. Eyes closed, that's who he'd seen, that's whose name he'd whispered as he came. That's who he'd wanted. And now, it was real. This was real. The wet heat around his cock was Sam. The hands touching him, squeezing him... Sam. The eyes locking with his, shining with love and desire... Sam.

Once Sam pulled off him and started licking, Dean's need doubled. He started to move his hips, trying to get the pressure he needed, seeking the heat of Sam's mouth again, and then his brother gave him what he wanted. A grunt breaking out of him, Dean pushed his cock into Sam's mouth, and cupping the back of his head, started to thrust. God, he wanted to fuck harder, but he was careful... not wanting Sam to choke, not wanting to use him like he'd used some of his stand ins. Reaching out with his other hand too, he carded his fingers through Sam's silky soft hair, dragging him close each time he thrust, pushing and pulling his head where he needed. "Oh God... God Sammy," he rasped, arching slightly. 

He could tell Dean was afraid of pushing in too deep. He'd had that happen in the beginning. Nothing less attractive than having the gag reflex kick in full force. But he learned how to relax his throat and how to control his reflex. He had sucked off guys who were tentative about fucking his mouth and he had learned how to coax them deeper, how to let them fuck him with abandon. Sometimes it got a little rough, but he was careful who he chose to approach and if the guy did get a little over enthusiastic, he almost always apologized. The couple that didn't, who were assholes, Sam taught them a lesson in humility. Or at least, a lesson in blue balls because he would get them right back up again and then slip out of their grasp at the time of their greatest need and sucker punch them then hurry away, usually telling some passer-by to call the cops, that some half naked guy was back where ever and looked like he needed help. He imagined there were a couple guys out there pissed as hell at him.

Sensing Dean's hesitation, Sam swallowed him deeper, going down harder on Dean than Dean dared to push. He dropped his hands from his brother's hips and reached down, undoing his own pants, releasing the painful pressure of his cock trapped inside his own jeans. His briefs were wet with precome and he ran one of his own hands over his cock as Dean began fucking his mouth harder, deeper, less afraid. Sam got his fingers good and slick with his own precum and wrapping his arm around Dean quickly found Dean's tight puckered hole. He pressed each time Dean pulled back until he was sure Dean was okay with it, then pressed his middle finger in deep, searching for the precious pleasure granting bulge that was his brother's prostate.

One of Dean's hands slipped onto his brother's shoulder, gripping him as he fucked that mouth that had tantalized him in his dreams. His brother showed him he could take him, allowing his cock to bottom out in the back of his throat. It felt so fucking good that Dean started to move with more abandon, his good intentions falling to the wayside. "Oh God Sam, so fucking good," he said, groaning as he felt his brother's finger penetrate him. Others had offered to finger him like that, but this was the first time he'd taken anyone inside him. "First time... first time I imagined this, you were doing homework and sucking the erasor on your pencil," he managed to breath out. "Couldn't fucking believe where my mind went. Had run to the bathroom... "

Not like Sam could answer him, he still wondered how long ago that had been. He would have to tell him about the shower. He wondered now if Dean had been jacking off to images of him. He loved that his brother was beginning to let go, to take Sam's mouth the way he wanted to. He encouraged Dean making sure to hit the prostate every time Dean pulled out of his mouth.

Lowering, his knees resting against his brother's shoulders, Dean started to fuck harder, groaning as Sam hollowed out his cheeks and sucked harder. "Fuck... Sammy... gonna come... oh God, Sam!" He pushed his brother's head back in warning as his balls pressed painfully tight against his body.

Sam gave a sound of refusal when Dean tried to pull out. No way in hell. He had imagined this so many times. He pressed hard on Dean's prostate and used his other hand to pull Dean up close and he took his brother's cock as deeply as was possible. He felt Dean stiffen and began swallowing rapidly as he felt the cum strike his throat. As Dean pulled back a little Sam sucked hard, coaxing more from his brother, doing this again and again as he pulled every last drop he could from Dean and he felt Dean's member finally begin to soften. Pulling off and taking his finger from Dean's hole, he licked his lips.

Dean watched Sam through heavy lidded, passion glazed eyes. His breaths were panting out, his body slowly unwinding and relaxing, his heart still beating too hard. "You have no idea... no idea how good it was," Dean whispered hoarsely, reaching to help his brother off his knees.

 

"You taste even better than I ever thought," Sam said, Dean's flavor strong in his mouth. He stood up, pushing his own pants down and kicking them off, his own erection still firm, his tip leaking milky white cum. He pulled Dean close and kissed him, pressing his own need against his brother, groaning at the sudden pressure on his cock.

Dean closed his arms tightly around his brother, running his hands up and down his body, molding him close as they kissed again, and again. He moved his hands down to Sam's ass, and lifted him up, turning and walking to the sofa. Dropping him down, he pushed Sam back lengthwise, and followed him down, his mouth unerringly finding his brother's. 

"You... you taste better than I ever thought," he echoed between kisses, manuevering his leg between Sam's so that every motion of his hip had his thigh rubbing and pressing against Sam's erection. Sam was so fucking hard, his cock was leaving a wet trail down Dean's thigh. Dean wanted to give him the same pleasure Sam had gifted to him. He started to kiss Sam's throat, nipping him, and laughing at the surprised sound little brother made. 

"Should'a expected that, you know I'm dangerous," he said, lifting his head and grinning. Then he stuck his tongue out, lowered his head and waited for Sam to do the same. They teased and played with each other for a while, before Dean stroked his wet tongue down Sam's throat, and curled it around a flat male nipple. His other hand was on Sam's side, the pad of his thumb stimulating his other nipple. Feeling Sam shudder under him, Dean groaned.

 

"I've never really made out with anyone," Sam gasped, arching as Dean sucked and teased his nipples. He had a little, only because when he asked one guy if he wanted a blow job, the guy wanted to blow him instead. He'd sort of made out with that guy a couple of times but it had been pretty tame. The guy really wanted Sam to fuck him, but Sam refused. He had finger fucked him but that was as far as he was willing to go. He dreamed of Dean fucking him and then Dean letting him fuck Dean. When Dean nipped him again Sam let out a sharp gasp. Every time Dean rubbed his hard cock it was almost torture.

"I heard you in the shower one morning, jacking off. I fucked my hand, matching your every groan and when I heard you come, I did too. I was," Sam lost his train of thought momentarily as Dean switched nipples and swirled his tongue around and around it. His hands caressed Dean's muscluar back. "...I was horrified that the sounds of you coming made me imagine you when I came. I tasted my own cum and wanted suddenly to taste yours. Unngh, God," Sam said writhing and squirming under Dean. "I wanted you ever since then." 

Sam wrapped the one leg that wasn't trapped by Dean around Dean's leg and started trying to rub himself against his brother, his need growing with the constant teasing his brother's tongue was giving to his body.

"Maybe we should stop this. Maybe we should make out for a while, have you doing it in the right order," Dean mumbled against Sam's chest, smiling as he felt his brother grab him to prevent him from getting up. "I'll take that as a 'no.'"

 

"That's a 'hell no, I'll kill you if you stop now,'" Sam growled. "And you know I can be dangerous too."

Moving his mouth back up Sam's throat, trailing hot kisses over his soft flesh, Dean found his way back to Sam's mouth. "Kissing session, with a kick... coming up." He repositiond his body so he was between Sam's legs, then shoved his hands under Sam's ass cheeks. "Put your legs around me," he suggested, lowering his mouth over his brother's in a hard kiss, and lifting his ass up as Dean ground his hips into him, giving Sam the pressure he needed.

Sam did as Dean told him and he groaned loudly into his brother's mouth as his cock was trapped and he could finally get something more than light fleeting bits of pressure on it. He began to kiss Dean harder, more ferverantly, more desperately. Sam used the leverage of his legs to rub harder against his brother's cum slickened body. His cum. He moaned at the thought, at the feel, and clung to Dean even harder. He didn't ever want this to end or to let his brother go. 

"Mmm," Dean groaned, loving how his brother moved with wild abandonment under him. Loving even more, how he tasted, how their tongues clashed and tangled, how their bodies moved to accomadate each other, knowing instinctively how to move, when to move, and what the other needed. He fucked harder against his brother, his cock starting to harden as Sam slid back and forth against him. "That's it," he whispered encouragingly, lifting Sam higher and grinding harder, faster against him, his breaths panting heavily, his muscles straining. "Love this... love you Sammy," he whispered the words in his heart, wrong as the world would find them, they were right for him. "Love you."

Sam, if he hadn't been so wrapped up in the feelings racing through his body, might have been surprised by his brother's words. Instead, he embraced them as so natural and so right. "Love you too, Dean. I want this always. You and me. Together. Like this," Sam managed to get out between his groans. He was getting closer and closer but he didn't want to just come like this, rutting against his brother. He wanted more. "Finger fuck me big brother, bring me over the edge," Sam begged Dean. 

The request had Dean's heart banging against his chest. He didn't know if 'forever like this' was feasible, if Sam would even want it. For Chrissakes he was only a kid, and he could fall for another guy or another girl anytime. But for as long as it lasted, Dean would accept what his brother would give him. And he'd give whatever Sam wanted.

"Up," he said, moving his hand down his body to force Sam to unlock his legs, then he had them both shifting so that he was underneath. Sam scrambled back on top of him, and Dean raised his hips so Sam could straddle him just right so their cocks rubbed together. As soon as he settled down, Dean pulled him close and ran his calloused hand over the smooth skin of Sam's ass, moving in circles, his fingers toying with Sam, almost touching his crack, then running down his crack very lightly, up and down, each time just a little harder. 

His brother was fucking trying to kill him, Sam thought but all he could manage was whimpers and gasps and moans. He tried to press back against that taunting flitting pressure against his ass but Dean kept it elusive, kept him wanting more. Sam began sucking on Dean's neck, biting and nipping and licking as he rocked against his brother. His cock was ready to release, so ready to spew his seed but there just wasn't quite enough pressure and it just wasn't quite right. They were both sweaty, their skin so damp. The need just kept ratcheting up inside Sam and he was getting almost frantic to find his release.

"Deeann," Sam whimpered. "I need you. I want you in me. Pleaaase."

Relenting, Dean caressed Sam's hole, then slowly but firmly pushed his middle finger inside his brother, gasping at how tight and hot Sam's felt, and how his inner muscles clenched around him, making him think of what it would feel feel like if his finger was replaced by his cock. That thought had him moaning. He started to finger fuck his brother, and sought out his mouth, now tongue fucking him and lifting his hips to the rhythm Sammy set. Harder, faster, they moved in unison. Sounds started to break from Dean as he felt Sam chase his release, and it ratcheted up the tension in his own belly. "Fuck..."

Sam pounded harder against Dean and when he finally felt that finger enter him, he knew he probabaly sounded like a porn star. "Yes, yes, yes," he murmured over and over until Dean's mouth swallowed up his chant. He tightened again and again around Dean's finger, wishing suddenly it was his brother's massive cock inside him. Dean's expert skills had all his senses roiling. His brother was the perfect lover. He knew exactly how to please Sam. Sam knew he gave damned fine blowjobs, but didn't know if any of his other skills even came close to the things Dean was doing to him. Pushing back on Dean's firm finger, then thrusting forward, all while Dean's tongue mimicked the motion had Sam thrusting harder and harder, his moans growing in volume the closer and closer he got. Then he felt it, that extra hard push on his prostate and Sam seriously thought he was going to pass out as he finally came, hot ropes of cum showering their stomachs, and he continued to ride out the orgasm, his body practically spasming with each new ejaculation. Stars, that's what he was seeing. Stars, fireworks, and blinding lights.

Oh God, his brother was coming... and Dean wanted to see, but he couldn't give up Sam's mouth, not this time... not the first time. So he put all his effort into making it good, learning what worked for Sam, and touching him just right. He felt hot sprays of cum spreading between them, and gave a loud groan as he joined Sam, finding his own release again. Curling his finger inside his brother, he brushed his gland again, satisfied that he was milking every reaction from Sam, getting every last drop from him.

They moved against each other like that, even after their dicks were softening. "Mmm, so good, Sam," Dean whispered. "You're perfect, you know that? Perfect," he said against his mouth, as he pulled his finger out and caressed Sam's ass, stroking him in circles. "And mine."

"I never thought this could actually ever happen," Sam sighed happily, squirming just a little teasingly, enjoying the feel of their mixed cum that slicked their stomachs. "From now on Dean, only yours." 

He kissed Dean and pulled back a little, looking into his brother's beautiful jade eyes. His face turned serious and his words heartfelt. He didn't want to smother Dean, didn't want Dean to feel locked into anything he didn't want. "I'm cool with you sleeping with hot girls if you want, so long as the only one who gets to give you blow jobs is me. And no sleeping with guys. Just girls." Sam grinned broadly. "Ooo, a threesome could be fun. Eventually. Besides, Dad'll begin to wonder if you suddenly stop hitting on girls. Maybe even a foursome as soon as I can join you at the bar and you can pick me out my first girl." 

He leaned in and kissed Dean tenderly. "Unless you want it just you and me. I'd kinda like it just you and me for a little bit. Cause I want you to spoil me. And I want to spoil you." Sam slowly began to kiss his way down his brother's body, nuzzling and nipping and licking and sucking. He slid down lower until he reached their mixed cum smeared over them both. His gaze locked on his brother's, he began slowly licking it from his brother's stomach, soft groans of approval slipping from him.

Dean's fingers carded through Sam's hair as he watched his brother through heavy lidded eyes. "I just don't wanna wake up to find out this was all a dream," he said, mesmerized by the movements of Sam's tongue cleaning him up. It was hard to believe this, that this was real. The things Sam said, did... it just didn't go together with Dean's impression of him. A younger brother, maybe 'forever young' in his mind, innocent... he'd probably forced himself to keep thinking of Sam that way, even past the time when Sam acted young and innocent. Compartmentalizing him that way might have made it easier for Dean to keep his hands of his brother. But why should Sam be innocent and completely untouched when he was nearly sixteen, when Dean himself hadn't been innocent at that age. Sure, they had different styles of approaching people, but he knew that when Sam wanted something, Sam went for it and got it. He must have been intentionally blind, even while Sam was the opposite, alert and aware of Dean's tendency to sometimes disappeare with guys.

He stroked one hand down Sam's back, making circle patterns. "I want that too, you to myself. Should be easy to pretend." He knew his dad was pretty damned perceptive, but he'd taught them to be good liars. "But Sam, if ... you know, one day this isn't what you want, you just gotta tell me, okay?" He let out a breath, "we'll _always_ be brothers, no matter what. Things change, they just did. And if they change again, we just... we deal."

"Don't worry about waking up and wondering if it was a dream," Sam half snickered. "When you look in the mirror in the morning and see the hickey I laid on your neck a few minutes ago when you were bringing me off, you'll know it was real." He crawled back up his brother's body and toyed with Dean's nipple as he laid his head on Dean's chest. Dean's heart was still pounding pretty fast. "Every guy I've ever been with, it was always you I was with. Girls...I still get nervous trying to ask them out. I like girls and everything and eventually I'm sure I'll want to sleep with a girl, but I loved you first. I'll love you always. And so long as you don't ever want anything different, I think I'd rather us be together this way more than anything. But you gotta tell me too, if you want something different. It's weird, that we've both had these feelings for each other forever. Do you believe in true love? I mean die for, love forever, true love? And not because of family, because of something...more. Deeper." 

"Hickey... great," Dean shook his head, but really, he did want to see the evidence, or he didn't think he'd believe it in the morning. "Same here," lifting his head, he kissed Sam. "Always you... the guys." Dean took a breath and made a satisfied sound as his brother kept touching and stroking him. "About forever love, romantic? I dunno, Sammy. I mean, in my mind, our parents had that... but was it because mom di--"

He looked away, feeling guilty about not only bringing mom up in that context, but what she would think of this... No, he wasn't gonna let it eat away at him. If and when Sam was done with him, he'd let his brother go. That meant he wouldn't be hurting Sam, or exerting some sort of influence he shouldn't be.

"Honestly... If there is real love like that, I don't know who else I could have it with," he looked at Sam. "I already loved you from the day you were born, even if you are a pain in the ass," he chuckled. "I don't know when I started to love you different, but it's there. And... you think we can table this? How the fuck did you get me into a chick flick moment," he asked gruffly, suddenly leaning over to grab Sam's packet of cigarettes. 

"Table this..." Sam said chuckling to himself. The valentine was on the table. When Dean reached across him, Sam swiped his tongue over Dean's neck and pinched Dean's nipple. He grinned at the groan he got out of his brother. 

When Dean settled back beside him, Sam scooted up so he was next to Dean and took an offered cigarette and let Dean light it for him. Twining his fingers with Dean's, he held his hand and took a long drag on his cigarette. Seeing the look Dean gave their hands, then him, he scolded, "deal with. I'm a romantic." Sam kissed his brother briefly on the lips then let his gaze roam up and down his brother's beautiful body, each ridge of muscle, each scar, pink nipples, and the most handsome face he had ever seen.

"It only happens once they say, true love is rare, but if you find this and if you dare, be my valentine, my one, my only, my valentine, mine," Sam whispered in his ear. "I'm glad you dared."

"You're such a girl," Dean shook his head, though Sam's hot breath warmed his ears, and his hot words warmed his heart like nothing else good. He took a drag of his smoke, the blew it out. Turning to his brother, he could see Sam was expecting something from him. "Ditto. Mine." Pulling Sam's hand up to his mouth, he kissed his brother's knuckles, one at a time, then leaned over and kissed him. "I'm not saying it's not. You know... true love." Giving a content smile laid back and took another puff. It had been a long time... too long since he'd felt comfortable around Sam, and in his skin. But things had just changed for the better, and even if he was afraid to say it out loud, in his gut... he knew it.

THE END


End file.
